One more Week

Today (Thursday) I hardly felt anything in my belly. Usually, over the past three and a half weeks, there has been some kind of a sensation or another. Always something going on in there. I have been thinking it might indeed be a sign that something IS changing, and at a faster rate than what has happened over the past two years or so when these two cysts have been growing ever so slowly.

Sometime next week I should get scheduled for the second MRI. The office at the Women's Cancer Care doesn't seem very much on top of my case... they have not called me back for the second day in a row. I take it I am not a high priority item. I wanted to find out if it might not make sense to get a sonogram first, before rushing straight into a second MRI... anticipating that my two 'visitors' have shrunk considerably... at least that's what it feeeeeels like. My own logic being that if a sonogram shows that shrinking has occurred, I might not need another MRI. Let alone surgery. But I'd already be happy to skip the noise attack of the imaging tube.

Thinking back to last week when Susan was here, I remember seeing them as about apple size. Today, as I am tuning into my intuitive size assessment, they seem not much bigger than a walnut and pretty shriveled. But do I know this for sure? Of course not. Could something inside of me be making this up? I just don't know.

Annabel was here again today for more sitting by the fire drinking tea and cooking dinner for Jimmy and me. It's been so sweet having her here every week, a touchstone and support.


I did book Aninas flight to Berlin AND my next trip to Hamburg!! I didn't even think about if I would have enough time to recover from surgery while searching for a low fare. Only this morning I paused for a bit. Can I really just assume I am not going under the knife? Well, it just seems more real, I just really believe that wont happen. So I went ahead and did it: I am leaving on April 14th for three weeks.


Yesterday I had another Journey. Wow, I am getting loaded! It perfectly tied in to my work with Cindy... my former Egyptian self showed up at the campfire and really needed to be forgiven, for what I still don't really know, but she clearly did and had some serious words, some excruciatingly deep remorse to express to my present self and to the people she had hurt all those centuries back... a large group, hundreds of them stood there in their robes and listened. "For the sake of humanity, for peace among human beings, we forgive you." This is what one of their elders, with a long white beard and wrinkled face said at the end.


It is late, I need to go to bed.
Good night my dear, dear friends!!
Tomma