Back Home - Wed. Jan 28th - 9:03 AM

Dearest sisters, goddesses, most wonderful friends in the world,

Yes, I am back home.
Right now, after stoking the fire, back in bed.
I am drawn to sitting and pausing, just feeling my body, just being quiet, resting, and letting the presence digest what is here.

Yesterday unfolded without too many bumps, the discharge took way longer than expected and sweet Carol not only witnessed my last official exchange with Dr Angell, in which he voiced his concerns about my decision, but also waited patiently for all the paperwork and procedurs to be done.

Odd experience to return back home after such a life changing interlude in the emergency world. The familiar surroundings somewhat sluggishly unresponsive to what I had been through and the change that was floating in my soul.

House was fairly good condition, but no fire burning, and Sophia in her bathrobe, and still - or rather - back again in bed after bringing Anna to school.
Relighting the fire was a major adventure, because the cold air had created a powerful downdraft that was blowing into the room and it took the two of us considerable effort and the endurance of MUCH smoke that billowed into the house before enough heat had been produced to reverse the trend... interesting.

Annabels visit was so sweet and comforting and quietly reflective, she embodies this long perspective into the past and my life here in Upstate New York. As she sat there, my mind could help but pour in little glimpses of memories of all we have lived through together, after all she was my very first, and for a long time my one friend up here... so much that those 17 years of participating in each others life have contained...

Sophia and Anina made dinner for me, and Nini especially was just in her most caring, helpful and sweetest self, asking if I needed this or that and telling me not to do this or that, she could really do that for me... Wow. I wonder if Annabel had a special talk with her, because they were both gone for a long while somewhere in the course of the afternoon.

Slept like a baby.


At some point I will kick into gear to begin defining what exactly this month of retreating looks like... Creating my mastermind group may turn out to be the first step... today I may just take it slow.

I love you all so very much!!
Tomma