And speeding up

I am writing this less for you all to read, I am writing this more for completion sake... and for my more distant blog readers...

I am thinking more and more often that my whole experience might be material for a book, and so I want to keep collecting these little pearls as they happen and keep writing them down... in my mind all of it is starting to take the shape of a long necklace, which right now hangs open and still incomplete somewhere in space, but at some point I expect everything that is still unanswered will have received a response and I will know this story has come full circle and the necklace is ready to be closed. Who knows how long that may take?

As my activities speed up now, I need to be diligent not to loose the continuity between what had happened and what is unfolding day by day.



The last week was so full, I hardly had a moment to catch my breath.

Thursday, as you may remember, was Jimmy's birthday, and we took off in the afternoon to pick up his daughter Jamie at the airport in Boston. We had it all lined up with a super bargain room through priceline at the Hyatt right downtown, a nice birthday dinner with Jamie, a good night sleep and a whole day ahead of us to see the town.

I had been feeling pretty good and much stronger, so I figured I could really do this. And I could, but wow, did I feel like an old woman again. Jimmy and Jamie, genetically matched in their desire and ability to see and do and pack into one day as much as most people would in two, half of the time forgot they had a hobbling old lady in tow, and there where a multitude of little moments when they, happily chatting away, within a couple of steps had left me yards behind them in the dust. Unique experience. More than once my presence forced them to take a taxi, when they would have probably chosen to stay on foot... but, ohhh, was I grateful for those car seats to sink into.

Packed as that day was, we didn't arrive back home until 1:00 am in the morning. By that time I was so worn out that any harsh word or unexpected challenge could have reduced me to tears.... gratefully I was able to sail straight into bed.

Not a whole lot of resting the next day, because I had promised myself I'd go to see the closing gallery talk for Karen's show in the morning (...and was I glad I did!)... and then there was Anina, with less than two days at home, who needed to pack and plan and organize and get herself ready to leave to Berlin on Sunday. Oh my God, these were my last few hours with her?

Sunday itself presented another sizable hurdle, as I had committed to host 10 people for an Easter/Good-Bye-Anina lunch with an obligatory leg of lamb and some vegetarian substitutes for Anina herself. And yes, everyone was very willing to help, but the orchestration and all the last second little this and thats were all in my hand... A bit of an emotional roller coaster of celebrating, immediately and jarringly followed by a flood of departure tears, the private pain of leaving her boyfriend behind, now visible to everyone. It was hard not to start crying right along with her, and heartbreaking to see her so sad... So, let me just say: that day too was A LOT.

Finale to Jamie's visit followed on Monday, and since I had not really been able to spend any more time with her, I had to catch up with that on Monday and participate in a mad dash to see the Sol Lewitt show at MassMoca before rushing back over to Albany to get Jamie on the 2:55pm train to NYC. As details sprinkeled in you can picture us trying to add a breakfast at the Hancock Shaker Village to the schedule, which had to be adjusted, because contrary to their website they do not serve a breakfast there any longer... which tossed us into a diner type operation with an antiseptic ambience north of Pittsfield that served my eggs Florentine with a dash of some nauseating chemical somehwere in the english muffin, ...the plan to leave me at the Clarke, in order to see the Toulouse Lautrec exhibit, because I had already seen Sol Lewitt twice also needed a substitute, since the Clarke is closed on Mondays... and because in spite of yelling as loud as I could, neither one of them heard me in the car driving off... I ended up hobbling all the way to main street to find a cafe to sit down in... and there at least a marzipan roibos tea with a delightful almond biscotti made up for the ill-fated breakfast...

Tuesday was our first day of an empty nest, but that didn't quiet sink in yet, plus I had my very first Journey session scheduled and on that account felt quite back on track with life.

Which brings me to yesterday when I started writing this piece, a day that finally... let... out... a... big... long... sigh... of... a... breath. .......Ahhhh.

Still need to take life a little bit slower.